I hate my hair

How many struggles with their hair every single day?
Everyone?
Or just me?

I like my hair.
They are finally not the complete idiot blond that I've had most of my life.
They are long and flowing.
They are strait.
All I have to do in the morning is to put a ponytail and I'm off.
They are what I want.
Except, I don't.

On my teens I made the mistake to start washing them daily, which increased the generation of the natural grease in the scalp.  This is now problematic, since I can't go two days without washing my hair. Not that it wouldn't be nice to have long warm shower everyday, but to do it in a bathroom that's average room temperature verges 10°C and dropping. Due to my bad blood circulation in feet and hand it would be more than devastating go through every single night.

Occasionally I play with ideas of cutting my hair in some chic modern way. But then wonder the consumption of time that would be taken to put it all together. I could stand it. For a while. In the end I'd hate myself. Why?
Since I started to think how my hair looked liked I've had nightmares. About someone forcefully cutting my long hair. It's an angst that I hate. I've got obsession with long hair. I would hate myself after cutting them.

Strait hair is good. I'm Nordic and it's the way our hair is.
A general notion is (seen also in movies) that curly hair is considered ugly and straight hair is beautiful. I like my strait hair that curls after washing, but straitens up again when dry.
The problem comes when you want to have a little bit more fancier hairdo than normally.
My brothers wedding is coming next summer and I want to look good in there.
I was in two weddings last summer, and both times I had trouble putting my hair up.
I curled and curled, I put mouse and hair spray on. Despite the efforts, it didn't look good.
Moderate, but not good.
I had to sleep with curlers on my head. And still in the morning my hair was too wet to hold it.
Besides, I reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally dislike putting stuff at my hair.
I like it when it's all natural and free.
Nothing holds.
Even though I put gallons of it at my head.
And then, I have to take it all off, and while doing it, loose a looot of hair.

I hate my hair.